Going back to work: how to hand your baby over to grandparents or a nanny

Grandparents and nannies bring real experience, and they will do some things differently from you. That is fine for most things. Choose the handful that matter to you and your baby's doctor, and talk about them calmly before the first day rather than in the doorway at 7:30.

• Feeding: what the baby drinks or eats, from which bottle or bag, and what to do with leftovers. If you are giving expressed milk, show where it is and which bag to use first.
• Sleep: where and how the baby sleeps. The AAP's safe sleep guidance — on the back, on a firm flat surface, nothing soft in the cot — applies to every carer, including experienced ones whose habits date from older advice.
• Medicines and remedies: nothing that the baby's doctor has not advised. More on this below.
• What to write down: every feed, diaper and nap, with the time.
• When to call you, and when to call the doctor or emergency services without waiting for you.

If possible, do one or two practice days while you are still at home, so the carer can ask questions and you can see how the routine works with them.

A handover card is one page that answers the questions the next person always asks first. Fill it in every morning, or send the same content as one message.

1. 1Right now: the time of the last feed (and amount or side), the last diaper (wet, dirty or both) and whether the baby is asleep or awake, and since when.
2. 2Today: the usual nap times, what the baby will eat, and anything different today — a vaccine yesterday, a bad night, an appointment.
3. 3Medicine: anything given in the last 24 hours, with the time and who gave it — or “nothing given”.
4. 4Who to call: both parents, the clinic, and the local emergency number.

Keep the card short enough to read in a minute. Long instructions get skipped; a few clear lines get followed.

Two adults caring for one baby is exactly when a dose gets doubled or missed, because each assumes the other gave it. A simple house rule avoids that:

• Only give a medicine, vitamin or remedy that the baby's doctor or pharmacist has advised, exactly as they instructed.
• Before giving anything, check the log for the last time it was given and by whom.
• Straight after giving it, write down the name, the time and your name.
• If you are unsure, do not give it — call a parent, the pharmacist or the doctor.

This guide does not give doses or say when a medicine is needed; that is for your baby's care team. The point is only that every carer writes in the same place.

When a baby moves between carers, one shared record beats several partial ones. On paper, keep the log in a fixed spot — on the fridge or by the changing table — and ask everyone to write in it. Take a photo at the end of the day if you want a copy.

If you prefer phones, a shared note or a group chat works, as long as everyone writes the same few things: time, what happened, and their initials. Messages scroll away, so at the end of the day copy the totals somewhere you will keep.

When you come home, read the last few lines before anything else: when did the baby last eat, sleep and have a diaper change? Then thank the carer — a handover that feels like an inspection does not stay a handover for long.

Many families in Vietnam and elsewhere rely on grandparents, and disagreements about feeding, swaddling, sleep or traditional remedies are common. A few things help keep both the baby and the relationship well:

• Separate safety from preference. Safe sleep, medicines and food safety are worth holding firm on; the order of the bath and the song at nap time are not.
• Point to the source rather than to yourself: “the doctor told us to…” or “the WHO and Bộ Y tế recommend…” is easier to hear than “I want…”.
• Ask what worked for them, and use it where it fits.
• Bring questions you cannot settle to the next check-up and ask the doctor together.

Baton keeps one log for the household through each person's own iCloud. Your partner gets an invitation that can add and edit entries; grandparents or a nanny with an iPhone can get “Invite with view only”, so they see the log, charts and moments as they happen but cannot change anything. Every entry shows who logged it — “by Mom”, “by Dad” — so you know what was done while you were at work.

For carers who prefer to message, More → Handoff writes the last 12 hours — feeds, sleep, diapers and medicines with their times, and whether the baby is asleep or awake now — as a text or an image you can send through Zalo, Messenger or any app. Going the other way, “Paste a message” reads what the carer wrote, such as “fed 120 ml at 3pm, wet diaper at 4”, using fixed rules rather than AI, shows drafts for you to check, and saves nothing until you tick it.

The health log (the Health button on Today) records a medicine's name and the dose as you type it, and Today shows the last dose and who gave it. Baton never calculates a dose; follow your doctor's or pharmacist's instructions. Logging, sync and Handoff are free.